Who was that masked idiot?

So what is next for me in my bumbling international quest to elevate foolishness to an art form?

I have a list!

I need to get a place, I can stay here for a month or two, but its a tiny house and its filled with all sorts of sentimental crap that makes me feel like I've been punched in the gut every time I take my eyes away from the monitor for more than 5 seconds. Jason and Bobby seem to be on board with the apartment idea, but I need somewhere that takes pets so that I may bring my wee mad bastard (the one on my shoulder)

I also need to get my shit together and learn how to drive. Being born and raised in a city (and 30 yards from a bus stop no less) I have never needed nor wanted to drive. Now the ability to cart my own lazy ass around town would come in handy, so I need to stop procrastinating and get down to the wretched DMV or whatever acronym it goes by here and get my learners permit.

I need to put some time aside to get blind drunk.

I need to get my eyes tested.

I need to go down to Virginia Beach to see the good doctor about going under the knife next year, not looking forward to that one.

I need to sort my finances out. All of my money goes into a joint account right now. Eventually that will have to stop.

I need to figure out what is going on with my green card, wild horses could not drag me back to Belfast.

I need to escape this god damned peninsula.

Obviously I need to get my priorities in order, so the first thing I need to do is buy an electric guitar.

What?

This seems like an odd move for me to make, but if I wait till after I do the other stuff, then I may not be able to get one. I used to play a bit back home, not in a band or anything, just fucking around on my fender in my room for hours on end. I always wanted to do more with it, but I got married instead. This is not a sensible decision, some would argue that it is not a sane decision, myself among them.

But I don't care. I'm buying a guitar, and its going to be fucking badass.